Bookshelf

General Personal Growth

  • Wisdom From the Couch

    by Jennifer Kunst, Ph. D.

    I remember when I read this book for the first time (I’ve read it 6 times) I could only take one chapter at a time with a glass of wine. Kunst describes hard life truths from Melanie Klein theory that we can all learn from. From love, to work, limitations, perfectionism- she is the sage you need in your life.

  • The Road Less Traveled

    by M. Scott Peck, MD

    The first line in this book is “Life is difficult.” This is another hard-truth book, but it’s SO good! Self-discipline, love, spirituality- it’s all covered. Highly recommended for a book club.

Relationships

  • Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find-And Keep-Love

    by Amir Levine, M.D. and Rachel S.F. Heller, M.A.

    This is a book I recommend often whether you are dating, single, or married. If you are curious about relationship dynamics and patterns that you may be bringing to the relationship, this is a good place to start: attachment styles. While no one is just one attachment style, we can tend to bring out some styles more than others. It’s also a way to identify what might be happening internally with your partner. These authors are able to describe attachment styles in a story-telling way and also getting to the point- if you know what I mean.

  • The Dance of Anger

    by Harriet Lerner, Ph.D.

    Ah- I love Harriet Lerner. While anger is an emotion that is usually repressed in women, Lerner shines a positive light on anger: it can tell us when too much of our self is being compromised. Lerner is the empowering woman you need to tell you to say no, to speak up for yourself, or to let it go. If you are experiencing anger in your relationships, you will love this book.

  • Getting The Love You Want

    by Harville Hendrix, Ph. D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph. D.

    This book is a crash course on couples therapy from how your childhood wounds affect the relationship to practical ways to enhance your connection. We tend to attach to someone who unconsciously brings out a wound from one of our caregivers. In our relationship we learn how to solve the wound or cope with it in ourselves and with our partner and Hendrix and Hunt give you the tools for that type of healing.

  • Hold Me Tight

    by Dr. Sue Johnson

    Dr. Sue Johnson walks you through seven conversations that maybe you didn’t even know you could have with your partner or didn’t have the language for. This is such a feel-good book because these conversations are exactly what you need to have in order to build intimacy and get your needs met from your partner. You’ll be glad you read this one.

  • The Human Magnet Syndrome: The Codependent Narcissist Trap

    by Ross Rosenberg M.Ed., LCPC, CADC, CSAT

    Do you ever feel like you give too much in a relationship? Or maybe you are more comfortable than most people with taking advantage of someone’s kindness? Rosenberg views relationships on a spectrum from over-giving, to mutual give-and-take to over-taking (for lack of a better term). People on opposite sides of the spectrum tend to gravitate towards each other: one is the taker and one is the giver. The closer you slide to the middle, the more you will be attracted to people who want give and take. While all relationships go through phases where one is giving more than the other due to circumstances, Rosenberg is able to give labels to help you get curious about who you are attracting in general.

Shame

  • Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle

    by Emily Nagoski, Ph.D. and Amelia Nagoski, DMA

    Burnout is so common, but we often catch it when it’s too late. Multiple factors compound over time and before we know it, we are snappy, lethargic, or give up. One of my favorite parts of this book is the explanation of the Stress Cycle. When we experience stress, it gets stored in our bodies. When we are safe from the stress, the stress needs to be released. This is called completing the stress cycle. If we don’t release the stress with self-care at the end of the day or week, the stress builds up and leads to burnout. These authors go into all the factors- even on a social level- that lead to a buildup of this stress and how to combat it. This book is so practical, and you’ll love it.

  • The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self

    by Alice Miller

    This book is for all my performers out there: the achievers, the do-gooders, the charmers. You learned from a young age that being all of this would give you love- grabbing for connection with emotionally disengaged caretakers- and to be honest, it worked. Part of coming of age and the therapy process is realizing that this wasn’t fair to you. You deserve connection without having to do all the shenanigans. This is the drama of the “gifted” child- who wonders if they were ever actually loved for who they were instead of what they did and wonders if they stopped performing if anyone would still care about them.

  • The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are

    by Brene Brown, Ph.D., LMSW

    There’s a part of becoming who you are that requires being comfortable with looking at your flaws that can only come through self-compassion. I love the “good enough” mantra of this book for those who are struggling with finding a balance between striving for more and accepting who they are. Brene is also just someone I would want to be friends with- she’s sassy and smart.

  • Daring Greatly

    by Brene Brown, Ph.D., LMSW

    One thing I love about Brene is the way that she breaks down emotional abstract concepts into something very concrete through her research. She is a self-proclaimed tough guy who doesn’t have time to get into her childhood issues. While she researches the power of vulnerability and how it leads to connection, she also realizes how resistant she is to being vulnerable herself. I love her style of writing through stories. She can describe how risky being vulnerable is, but through her research has determined it’s the only way to build connection and live whole-heartedly.

Personality Disorders

  • Stop Walking on Eggshells

    by Paul T. Mason, MS and Randi Kreger

    Do you love someone with BPD? Or work with someone with BPD? Maybe you are suspecting you have BPD yourself? These relationships can be complicated and volatile- like walking on eggshells- but it’s important if you are in a relationship with someone with BPD to know what the diagnosis is about. These authors walk you through push-pull dynamics, rage outbursts, lack of stability: how to know what’s going on, and how to manage your own reactions to the relationship so that you don’t have to follow the same patterns of ups and downs as the person you love with BPD.

  • Should I Stay or Should I Go? Surviving A Relationship With A Narcissist

    by Dr. Ramani Durvasula, Ph. D.

    I absolutely love Dr. Ramani’s work- and her YouTube channel- all about Narcissism and Narcissistic relationships. It’s hard to spot Narcissism until after looking back on a relationship: the love bombing, manipulation, grandiose future faking, and gaslighting. However, with Narcissism on the rise, it’s important to equip yourself with knowledge of what it looks like so that you won’t get dragged in to become their Narcissistic supply- and ultimately hurt by them. Dr. Ramani explains the nuances of leaving these types of relationships, or staying in them- whatever your decision may be.

Physical Health

  • Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life

    by Emily Nagoski, Ph. D.

    Nagoski is like the older sister you need in your life to break down all things related to sex from anatomy, to the psychology and attachment related to sex, to complications you might encounter. What I love about this book is how she speaks about our bodies in such a positive way and you will leave reading this book feeling more comfortable in your own skin and sexuality.

  • Body Kindness: Transform your health from the inside out- and never say diet again

    by Rebecca Scritchfield, RDN

    This book reads like a magazine. While there are so many influences that make our bodies our enemies, Scritchfield helps us to reunite with our bodies to build a loving relationship. From sleep, to throwing away the scale, to adding fun into your life, to building friendships that are body positive. I love it all.

  • Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Anti-Diet Approach

    by Evelyn Tribole, MS, RDN, CEDRD-S and Elyse Resch, MS, RDN, CEDRD-S, FAND

    This is THE handbook that explains the 10 principles to Intuitive Eating so that you can get off the ups and downs of dieting and live a life of freedom to make your own food choices with your body intuition. Not only is this book about eating, but it is also a way of life: loving your body and listening to your body.

Parenting

  • Fair Play

    by Eve Rodsky

    I absolutely love how this book describes the struggle of managing a home and family from the mental decisions to the physical to-do’s. Managing a family and splitting time and chores with your husband or wife is difficult- and usually one person is bearing too much of the burden of it all. Fair Play breaks down all the possible tasks under the umbrella of having a family and how to split it with your significant other so that resentment doesn’t build and so that your time/energy is used efficiently- then maybe you can schedule in some time for self-care?

  • Parenting From The Inside Out

    by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D. and Mary Hartzell, M.Ed.

    A common concern I hear from parents is that they don’t want to pass on generational trauma to their children. This book goes into the neurobiology of our early memories and how it can shape who we are as well as how we parent. Then it provides ways to form secure attachment to ourselves and our loved ones. Highly recommend!

  • A Parent’s Guide to Intuitive Eating

    by Dr. Yami Cazorla-Lancaster DO, MPH, MS, FAAP

    If you’re wondering how to support your child with their eating habits and body image, this is a great place to start. Also becoming an Intuitive Eater yourself will help model ways to think about food and to be kind to your body for your children.

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